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Lessons in Life 1
Love Techniques
Lessons in Life 2
For your co-workers
Hamudistan Facts

- I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

- I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes. 

- I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

- I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes.After that, you'd  better have a big dick or a chunky wallet.  

- I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others.They are more fucked up than you think. 

- I've learned that you can keep puking long after you think you're finished.

- I've learned that we are responsible for what we do,unless we are celebrities.

- I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first,the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place. 

- I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones who do. 

- I've learned that we don't have to ditch bad friends because their dysfunction makes us feel better about ourselves.

- I've learned that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get arrested and end up in the local paper.

- I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.

- I've learned to say "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke" in 6 languages.

- Pass this along to your friends...trust me, they'll appreciate it. Who knows, maybe something good will happen.- If not ... tough shit.